We don’t have those here

It’s a funny old thing – language. And they’re funny old things – words. And rube is a word that we don’t have here. While I can look it up and write something that approximates to what it really is, as it’s the weekend, I thought I’d make something up. You know, for fun. If it’s good enough for Shakespeare…

A rube is a block from a Rubik’s cube (now feverishly worrying that I’ve spelled Rubik incorrectly but, it’s the weekend, Shakespeare couldn’t even spell his own name and I’m letting it go). For ultimate rubeness, you want a red rube which is known as a ruby rube for obvious reasons.

A rube is a person on social media that is rude but cannot spell or has a seriously faulty spell-checker – or both.

A rube is a sub-standard ruby that doesn’t make you smile and, therefore, you don’t get the smiley shape that the y sound makes.

A rube is that moment when you go into a room to get something and you realise that you’ve forgotten what is was but you congratulate yourself for remembering you have forgotten something. When you just go into a room and have forgotten why but you don’t know that you’ve forgotten, it’s known as a furtigan but no one uses this term as no one realises that they’ve done it.

A rube is a Saturday when you make words up. Happy rube-day.

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